JohnKowalsky.com
A Self Evolving Site
Posts tagged Beliefs
Who Are You In Your Head?
Nov 3rd
In light of the recent holiday (Halloween), where you got to dress up and go masquerading around as whoever you pleased, I’ve been thinking about how we often wish we could be someone else.
I recently wrote about the importance of beliefs, and today’s topic is a big one: Other people tend to see you, as you see yourself.
Try this out, just for fun, and see if it doesn’t help you. Find a character from a movie, someone that you can watch and listen to. Pick somebody who has what you want in your life (whether it be success, confidence, integrity, money… whatever). Then Study this character… memorize the way they walk and move, the way they talk. Their facial expressions and body language.
Then for five minutes a day, when you’re alone, in front of the mirror, Be that person. Talk like them, move like them, act like them. Really make the character your own. See yourself in their location, see the people that would be surrounding this person, and pretend that they are surrounding you. Interact with these imaginary people… what would you say? what would you talk about as this new you?
Change the way you see yourself for the better. When you’re in that situation where you would normally freeze up and go into failure mode, ask yourself, “what would (your character’s name here) do?”
I’ll let you in on another little secret I’ve found: You’re brain can’t tell the difference between something you imagine happens and what really happens.
Both things are equally real to your brain. Take dreams for example. If something happens in a dream, like a friend dying, or you getting a promotion… when you wake up, supposing you’ve remembered your dream, then your brain treats those memories as actually having happened. So you wake from the dream of your friend dying with a pounding heart and an aching chest, just as you would have if your friend had actually died. And you wake from the promotion dream with the same exhilaration and expectation of a person who actually did just get a promotion.
Take Advantage Of Your Imagination
Use this to your advantage… don’t wait for a good dream that you actually remember when you wake up. Make up your own dreams while you’re already awake. It’s how we learned as kids too. We called it make believe, or pretending. See yourself as the best you possible. And when you need some help, switch into your alter ego and pretend, until you’re no longer pretending.
Don’t Make It, Earn It
Oct 29th
For most of my life, I’ve had some unhealthy views about money. Most people who grew up poor do. In my transitional stage of being middle class, on my way to being rich, it was brought to my attention that my beliefs about money still need to be improved.
There have been many false beliefs that have already been replaced with better ones. Do you have any harmful beliefs that might be holding you back? Take a second and think about it. Do you still believe that money is evil? And yet you desperately want some? Do you want to be healthy, so you workout and go on a diet, all the while believing in your heart that you are fat, and always will be… but wouldn’t it be nice to be skinny like those other people.
These are the kind of beliefs I’m talking about… the ones that we have programmed our brains to work by. When we try to do something in our lives that goes against what our brains have been programmed (beliefs) to do, our brains will self sabotage us. Think about it… have you ever been three days into that new diet and you’re starting to feel really great, when all of a sudden you seem to hit a wall and the only thing you can think about is that Whopper Value Meal? And you’re thoughts become more and more irrational, until you’ve convinced yourself that it’s okay to cheat just this once… and before you know it — you’re back on your same old SAD (Standard American Diet) lifestyle.
And while we’re kind of on the subject (or at least we will be), who is your role model in life? I’m not talking about the famous people… the actresses or models who have the kind of body that you want. I’m talking about the real life, in your life, people who have been where you are and have gotten to where they are. Seek these people out. Pick their brains. Find out how they did it. Become best friends. Statistically, you become who your peer group (friends) are. Don’t believe me? Look at the annual income of your 5 best friends… add them all up and divide by 5 to get the average yearly income… Now look at your yearly income, I bet it’s almost the same. Maybe it’s time for some new best friends. At the very least, find a few friends who at least want to better the quality of their lives and are trying to do something about it. Don’t befriend talkers, befriend doers.
So, back to my faulty money belief… Again, while reading (I’m an avid reader, and if you want to be successful, than it’s my belief that you should be too… just ask anybody who has come from nothing and made themselves successful — you gotta learn somewhere) Anyway, I was reading a book about finances and the author, Larry Winget, (you might know him from A&E’s show Big Spender) was talking about most people’s views on money. He brought up the point that, You don’t make money, you EARN it! Most people just want to have more money, they don’t want to earn it.
Do you see how this can be a hindrance to actually having more money in your life? Most people want to have better things, but they never do anything to get those things. Be an earner.
