JohnKowalsky.com
A Self Evolving Site
Archive for January, 2009
Overcoming Emotional Pain
Jan 7th
After many years struggling with the pain of break-ups and other life altering emotional pains, I had an epiphany the other day that I’d like to share.
If something is causing you pain, Let Go Of It!
That’s it… It took me years to figure that one out… I should have listened to myself as a child with the stove. Let’s think about it though.
Physically, if you were to grab a hot pan, what would you do? You’d get it out of your hand as soon as possible, right? Does this mean you’ll never use or relate to that pan again? Hardly… it just caused a pain in you that was undesirable, so you let it go.
It is the same thing with emotional pain… you don’t stop feeling or loving or expressing, you just let go of whatever it is that’s causing the pain.
This can be difficult as most people confuse how they feel for who they are. You are not your emotions.
Pain is often a teacher that helps us to realize what we need to grow and heal… Hence, why we tend to repeat painful lessons over and over again, until we’ve finally learned them. Often we become addicted to the emotional pain/depression, and like a drug addict (which is literally what’s happening to your brain chemistry), every time we begin to feel ok again, we trigger a memory or something else that sends us spiraling into emotional pain again, and our brain gives us a chemical fix for that depressing feeling.
In the same way that a drug addict has to detox and quit the habit, if you’ve become addicted to the buzz of your emotional misery, than you’ll need to quit as well.
How do you do this? A Higher Power always helps (hence why it’s part of the programs NA & AA), and then you take responsibility for your thoughts.
When your thoughts begin to stray down a path that you know will tear open the healing wound and cause you pain, you simply don’t go there anymore… You let go of it, or maybe a better way of looking at it, is You Stop Holding On To It.
In the end, it all still comes down to healthy thoughts. Garbage In, Garbage Out… You are what you think you are… and you truly are what you eat (literally, it’s what your body is physically made of).
Much Love and Sunshine! 
)…
Viva La Resolution!
Jan 3rd
Hello, and welcome to a brand new year! Every year, around this time, everyone is expected to have their new year’s resolution. I’ve had the typical ones in the past: lose weight, exercise more, blah, blah… but this year, I’ve decided to step it up a notch, and stretch myself farther than ever before.
This year I want to say yes to the opportunities that Life presents. No more waiting for things to happen to me, no more passing up on things because I’m in fear that I might miss out on something else. I want to jump in the River and be in the Flow this year. I want to follow my heart and live as One with everything. I want to practice “You are Me also” in everything I do. I want to experience more in this single year than I have in all my previous 26 years of life.
What is this going to entail for me?
I’m going to have to stop living in fear, and begin living in love (not just in word, but in actual deed as well). No more worrying about things that ultimately don’t matter like food, clothing, and shelter. If I want to do something, then I want to do it this year! No more talking about it, or daydreaming the thing to death. It’s great to have dreams, but I’ve evolved to the point where I’m ready to create reality out of my dreams.
And what about you, dear Reader? What will your year be like? Will you end up in the same place, having gone nowhere and done nothing?
I often joke with my friend that there’s no way 2009 can be worse than 2008 (I went through a lot of painful growing), but it could be, if I don’t use what I’ve learned from 2008.
Ultimately it was 2008 that inspired me to live my 2009 in such a way. As a celebration of making it out of 2008 alive. And I hope I’m still celebrating living in 2010, but I’m not worried about it if I’m not 
Whatever you’ve decided 2009 will look like, I hope you that you make it a beautiful reality. Don’t just wait for Prince Charming to come swoop you off your feet this year, become a Princess first, if you want a Prince. (and vice versa for all you guys out there, if you want the girl of your dreams than first become the man of hers)
Love you all, and as always, think about it!
